I've been rereading one of my absolute favorite books, Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers. Although I read it and learned from it before, reading it again has knocked the wind out of me, convicted me, and given me grace in such a sweet way. (Sidebar: highly recommend. Please read it.)
The story of Redeeming Love is based on the story of Gomer and Hosea in the Bible. In the first chapter of Hosea, God calls Hosea to marry a prostitute. Francine Rivers bases her narrative off of the narrative of Hosea. Redeeming Love starts her story with the story of a young girl who is sold into prostitution at 8 years old. Angel has been betrayed, cast aside, used, beaten, and told she was unworthy all her life. She learns not to trust others, to harden her heart against the world to survive. However, one day, God calls Michael Hosea to marry her, so Michael obeys. He rescues Angel from prostitution and fights to start a new life with her as man and wife. He loves her as God has told him to, even when it gets hard. And trust me, it gets hard for him to love her.
Something that the Lord has taught me in the first 200 pages is that there is no earthly example of His love. There is no Godly resemblance of His love without Him in it. As in Redeeming Love, the world teaches us to harden our heart against others because of sin. Sin makes us selfish, to use others for our own good. However, the love of God teaches us to fight for love. Love comes directly from God. We lean on His strength to love when it gets hard, but if we don’t, then that is not love. As humans, we cannot love correctly if God is not present in our relationships. As is ingrained in my head from every wedding ever, love is patient, kind, consistent, and does not depend on our works. Love keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not depend on what we do, but leans into who we are.
For so long I have lived in the assumption that the examples set before me are the examples of how I am to love people- my friends, my family, even myself. When I was a freshman in high school, my parents separated. What ensued was a painful example of false love. From my parent's divorce, I began to assume that love was based on our performance. I began to assume that I could so something to end love or ruin love. The world gives us that example to lean on. The love of the world shows us that we must earn love from others.
But no example on Earth can compare to the love of our God. We do not have to earn His love, because if we did, we'd never be able to deserve it. As someone who has not understood my worth for almost my entire life, this lesson has hit me hard. The reality is that God's love stepped down from Heaven for me. His love endured humiliation and persecution for me. His love suffered and died for me the most painful death that anyone could ever experience. And He’d do it over and over again. His love promised to never leave me, and it never has. His love is eternal.
Michael in Redeeming Love had a hard time loving someone who did not want to love him back. Angel ran from him both mentally and physically. She did not want to be loved because she thought she did not deserve it. (Oh how I can relate to her!) But Michael relied on the strength of the love of God to love her. He did not rely on His own will, but looked to our eternal father as a solid foundation. This is how we are to love those around us. We are to love through looking at His example of love- relying on Him and trusting in Him always.
When we rely on our strength to love, we will fail. This is the cause of divorce, separation, and the loss of commitment in relationships on Earth. But when we rely on Him and look to Him and His example to love those around us, it does not matter how that person loves us, how they perform, or if it's easy to love them. When we rely on the Lord to love us, as is promised time and time again in His word, we can love without hesitation or regret. We learn to love wholeheartedly as soon as we can understand that the greatest example of love ever displayed is symbolized through the cross.
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